Wednesday, November 11, 2009

What Would Grover Drink?

Sunny Days
Drinkin' our
cares away...

In celebration of the 40th Anniversary of Sesame Street on PBS, I began to think – as I often do – about fictional characters that I would like to sit and enjoy a good beer with. What? You have never imagined what it would be like to share a drink with a fictional person... or monster? Or a dinner party? Well, in my head, its always beer. And maybe some food to compliment what we are drinking, but I try to imagine what kind of brew these characters would order, should I happen to meet them in a pub and they had a break from their regular schedule of… whatever it was they did. So without further ado…

Grover – Grover has always been a bit of a wacko, and I mean that in a good way. Excitable, energetic, and with a serious lack of self control, I think he would enjoy the hoppier beers. Probably knock back some IPAs like Cigar City Jai Alai or Sierra Nevada Torpedo. Although there is a rumor that he has been particularly partial to a certain Monster beer...

Ernie – The ultimate clown and life of the party, Ernie likes all craft beer. His choice will vary depending on his mood and the company he is keeping. But his irrepressible hijinx are best captured by the name of his favorite: PranQster.

Bert – The polar opposite of Ernie, Bert is really more of a wine or martini man, but he does enjoy a good sipping brew. Something complex and strong like a barleywine would do him nicely: Old Foghorn or Bigfoot would suit him well.

Count von Count – One would imagine at first that our pseudo-vampire friend would enjoy the darker beers like stouts and porters, but I have it on good authority that his favorites include Magic Hat #9, 8 Ball Stout, Lucky 13, and of course… Numbers Ale. Four… four beautiful craft brews!!! AH AH AAAAHHHHH….

Oscar – Ah, the grouch. Oscar has long been one of my favorites. He says what he thinks, he doesn’t really care what others think about his opinions, and he likes his beer heavy. Imperial Stouts, the darker the better. I imagine you would find several empties of Mephistopheles and World Wide Stout in his can.

Herry Monster – Herry is your working-man’s monster. He is not a craft beer lover or aficionado, but he likes a good, drinkable ale. He is not adventurous in his tastings, and sticks with what he knows and likes: Rogue American Amber Ale. The (relatively) low ABV lets him enjoy several while hanging out with his monster buddies and keep his head straight.

Kermit the Frog – I always imagined Kermit as a whiskey drinker. Good Kentucky bourbon or single malt Scotch. He hits the Jim Beam or Jack from time to time after a particularly rough day on Sesame Street News or dealing with the thespians of the Muppet Show. He does give props to Hoppin’ Frog, however.

Big Bird – The problem with Bird is he is really just a kid. But I am going to run with the idea that he has aged, and is now a late-thirty, early-forty adult. I suspect, however, that he is a light American lager drinker if he HAS to drink beer. Usually it’s wine coolers, though.

Aloysius Snuffleupagus – Bet you didn’t know he had a first name, eh? Snuffy is a big, hulking mammoth of a beer drinker, and he likes his beers big, too. Belgians are his favorite. His trunk is often seen holding Delirium Nocturnum or La Trappe Quadrupel. Snuffy doesn’t mess around.

There are others, of course... but we'll see who picks up the tab this time and who gets invited to the barbecue outside Hooper's Store.


  1. This is AWESOME! I love Big Bird. When are you coming to southern Illinois so we can have a few?